The quality of our lives is determined by our ability to deal with uncertainty - Dave Barrie

How to deal with anxiety?

What is anxiety?

Anxiety is simply the habit of worrying spiraling out of control. But it can be helpful to avoid danger with our ‘flight or fight’ responses.

However, your models of the world will affect how you feel and if you become overly worried about perceived threats that may not even occur or have a strong emotional need for certainty in multiple areas of your life you’re going to have a very stressful time dealing with day to day life. How will you feel if your worries are persistent? Could you learn to become more flexible?

Anxiety is the most common mental health condition in Australia and a third of women and a fifth of men will experience an anxiety disorder in their lives.

Remember, everyone has anxiety, problems and fears in their life. The difference is how we mentally and emotionally condition ourselves. What training do I need to do?


What’s the cause of anxiety?

When we are consistently feeling the emotions of worry, fear and overwhelm in non-life threatening situations. It’s a habit from repeated cognitive thinking, behavioural tendencies and emotional reactions that a person does without even realizing it. For example; how many people are afraid of public speaking? Do I know anybody who has died from public speaking?

In most anxiety cases people are afraid of losing their life, relationship, possessions and the inability to achieve their dream. If you know how to achieve what you need and want, we don’t fear the unknown as much. Life will test all people for their personal courage and persistence.

Traumatic events will trigger anxiety but it’s not the reason people live there emotionally. People stay there because they have unconsciously trained themselves to feel the way they do. For example; where do you live emotionally? Could I train myself to be strong, passionate and joyful? But it isn’t what you do occasionally it’s what we’re doing consistently.


Learn to use fear or it will use you

Its not that high performers are not afraid, its that they want to live up to their own potential and definition of success. One of the best ways to treat anxiety is learning how to leverage fear rather than being immobilized by fear and anxiety. There is only one way to learn and that is by action. Anxiety, worry, fear and having poor self-esteem is cured by action. When you stretch yourself and not waver with your dreams, goals and vision especially when it’s not going well by giving myself no way to go back I must worry about how I’m going to move forward. And that’s the hallmark of a growth-mindset.


Below are 4 practical ways to treat anxiety


  1. The number one regret of the dying

Imagine yourself in the nursing home reflecting on how you chose to live.

How would I feel knowing I had done all the things I wanted to do? Health, relationships, career, lifestyle. How does that make me feel knowing I will soon die? Will I be able to look back and say I lived my life with great purpose and joy?

What about from the perspective of not for filling my dream, goals and vision. Could I have done the things that made me feel anxious? uncomfortable or afraid? Do I have regrets or feel sadness? What did I miss out on? Who did I let down?

How will you feel when you know it’s too late to do the things you always wanted to do? And realize it’s because of how you approached your life. Remember, the choices we make shape our destiny.


  1. Mind bank

Because I’m a person who has always had anxiety and had multiple incidents of extreme trauma. I still have panic attacks and sometimes for no reason at all, but I will recall previous experiences of panic attacks and how I resolve quickly. Your self-talk is critical. I recommend using empowering vocabulary and reminding yourself that it will pass as it’s a situation you can handle. This will shift your focus from anxious to excited. Become a curious person and write down approaches for next time.

If you see the world as a threatening place are you going to see and feel the world is a threatening place? Do I need to change my models of the world?


  1. Decisive action

We don’t have to wait until we feel good. A lot of the time you won’t be motivated to do the things you know you need to do. For example; exercise, eat well, develop skills or regulate your emotions. But that’s a major difference between those who move past any obstacle they encounter in life and those who don’t. I do it regardless of how I feel, and it develops into the habit of not giving up and adjusting my approach when I do fail. How bad do you want your dream? Am I seeking a dream without wanting to live it out? Why do so many people not achieve their ultimate dream? They’re afraid it might not happen, and their fear of failure prevents them from starting in the first place or we start to experience a few obstacles along the way and that’s when most people give up. I will use my emotions, anxiety and energy to propel myself forward towards my worthy goals and dreams. Because mastering the lessons and healing from pain is a conscious choice.


  1. Move your physiology

When our mental: emotional patterns are left unchecked our anxiety can spiral out of control and manifest into emotional or physical symptoms or both. For example; anxious, fearful, sweating and struggling to breathe. But when you change your physiology, it will change your state of mind. You can alter your alertness  by changing body positions to sit upright in the chair, standing powerfully with hands on hips, drinking a cup of water, dancing, gratitude practice and deliberate breath-work. Being intentional with your actions will change your focus. How will you change your focus?

If I feel any form of anxiety or stress that I know is not going to serve me I will give myself one minute to change my mental: emotional state. Anything more than one minute I consider dwelling. Unfortunately, most people approach life looking for what can go wrong? Does this mean I have the habit of spending more time looking for what is wrong? Could I ask myself? How can I turn this situation around? Because where focus goes, energy flows.

Anytime I realize my focus is off and there are unhelpful negative emotions, I know I must realign my mind and my heart. When your mind and heart are aligned you will feel calm and find the solutions you need. My attention then goes to my mission which makes me feel like I have immunity against any obstacle or personal challenge. If you’re stuck in your head you’re dead. Why do we need to listen to our hearts?


For self-discovery;

  1. Identify why I have anxiety?
  2. What are my triggers?
  3. Will I do the training and self-discovery work?


To your health,


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