The great enemy of human potential is the comfort zone. Most people are deathly afraid of the unknown, but the greatest leaders know how to create certainty in the midst of the unknown. Am I an individual who goes through life reacting or with focus and concentration? Is it a surprise to see the happiest people you know look more awake and aware of what makes them fulfilled? Therefore, you must take more control of your mental thought processes to create your self-ideal. This is your combination of attributes for your perfect self? For example; loving, compassionate, forgiving, purposeful, integrity, honour, courage, service and contribution.
Of course, your attitude is the way you approach life and here are 3 things that you could do to improve your self-love and self-esteem.
- Adopt a GROWTH-MINDSET
Human beings are literally designed to learn and evolve? And Dave believes if you’re not growing, becoming better, more skilled at any area of your life. It doesn’t matter who the individual is you’re not going to feel amazing about yourself. The more an individual engages with continuous leaning, continuous improvements they’ll feel not only more in control of their lives but will also experience more positive emotions. What area of my life will I take to a whole new level? Body, Relationships, Emotions, Career.
Would it be fair to say that mental health is the mental tension between where one is and what one feels he/she should do, accomplish or become? Whose fault is this? Do I have to engage in learned helplessness or competitive victimhood? Is it wise for individuals to tear people down to feel important? Could I learn something else to make my life better? How will I create a meaningful life? Do I know what my life is about? If not, why not?
- Do I finish what I start?
Do I keep firm promises to myself? For example; I turned my life around at 15 after my identity crisis and I imagined what I could do with my life at school assembly’s. I dreamt about being an Australian champion in sport and meeting other high-performers to one day return and train children at my local high school. During my adolescence I also anticipated the need for me to close the gap on how society was evolving with technology, globalization and social media. I could foresee the benefits for people. But I also had to give up a lot on a personal level to develop skills, characteristics and habits. It’s a price that must be paid in full. I wasn’t gifted all the skills, nor the confidence and I had to become a person who would change the game with our physical and mental: emotional health epidemics. 15 years later I’ve held out and we will create history.
Do you think my self-esteem is increasing as I continue to close in and work towards this childhood dream?
Self-Esteem is the hallmark of a healthy personality. Given that I’m an individual who has experienced multiple incidents of extreme abusive trauma and societal beliefs would have you suggest it’s not possible to be a high functioning and total loving human being. Self-esteem is how you feel about yourself? Essentially, HOW much you like yourself? And your feelings of self-esteem will only develop as a side effect of doing well in the world.
Martin Seligman, Ph.D. Recommends all people and “Children need to fail” to gather emotions, if we impulsively protect people and children from failure we deprive them from learning. And when encountering obstacles if you bolster self-esteem to soften the blows we distract individuals with congratulatory ebullience making it harder for them to achieve mastery.
- APPRECIATION AND GRATITUDE
Appreciation and gratitude are two of the most powerful spiritual emotions. From cultivating these emotions you can wipe out fear, anger and frustration instantly because it alters the biochemistry in the brain. For me, practising gratitude EVERYDAY is a form of deliberate action where I can express my thanks for what I have, the love and energy I can give to others, the amazing relationships I’m developing and the memories and experiences I have done or shared. When I deliberately cultivate these emotional states I am enhancing the quality of my life because what we focus on grows, and the reality is there is ALWAYS something to be grateful for? How am I going to feel if I always focus on the negatives, searching for problems to complain and always worried about what can go wrong?
Remember: Everything you and I do is directly related to the love you have in your life or lack of. Yes, your goals, dreams and commitments are because of how you feel about yourself and what you believe. Will you EARN your self-esteem?
Promise yourself
- How can I love myself if I’m not even being myself?
- Will I be one of the few individuals who honestly lives out their life mission and dreams?
- There is always something to be grateful for? What am I grateful for?
To your PERSONAL development,
Dave