Category: Emotional Mastery

Accepting this as TRUTH maybe one of the hardest things you ever do, and that’s why most people never will. Because it brings to the surface (and uncomfortably) deep societal problems and how we’re dealing with them. We can never give away PERSONAL- responsibility we can only give away control. And equally understanding when to surrender to situations outside our control? #PersonalLiberation

The solution is simple. I didn’t say it’s always easy. Morally you don’t have to, but I hold and TRAIN myself to this mental: emotional foundational standard. Because when we release or create any energy: habit that allows us to shift to a higher-level consciousness it ultimately changes the way we want to feel. Your story maybe true – but it’s certainly not the reason people can’t have the life they deep down want.

Because how we deal with negative thoughts is a choice, and denial is the ultimate comfort zone?

Who are you? Why do you exist? What experiences do you want to have? What’s stopping you from appreciating what you already have in your life?

What do I tolerate from myself that I know I need to change and haven’t? How do I feel about myself when nobody else is around? How do I respond to set-backs? What’s my reaction when I fail? How does the burn of rejection make me feel? Is my life over when loved ones die? WHAT IS YOUR DEEPEST EMOTIONAL PAIN?

NOW… are people born a victim of the world? Do I like to have big problems or solve problems? Is having a big problem a safer way to connect with other people than putting yourself fully on the line to achieve something extraordinary? Am I addicted to my problems? Why am I not improving?

➡️ Would a really honest person work on their emotional wounds, deliberately attack their fears, and be open about their weaknesses, inadequacies, insecurities and still work on them? Does life have a way of showing all people their weaknesses? And if I was to spend most my time on earth ? avoiding my problems, reactive, addicted and consciously or unconsciously neglecting the causes to my problems WHAT emotional states would I consistently feel? What could be the consequences; physically, mentally, emotionally, spiritually, financially and relationships?

Is mental illness optional? Are people’s behaviours diseases? How do I know it’s true? What would I have to believe? Would it be wiser to analyse my weaknesses or create alibis that sound good? Would I have to un-learn something? For example; habitual perception patterns, attitude, beliefs, behaviours, natural tendencies. Is it my responsibility to figure out ways to sustain my effort? How can I get energized? For things to get better as a society WE must become better? Therefore my approach to life is if I want anything to change I must change, and if I want things to be better I must become better? This leads me to ask myself am I being accountable for EVERYTHING in my life? and live with my power virtues; gratitude, courage, honour, faith, love, determination, compassion and contribution. I feel these are some of the dominant emotions that we must nurture. Will I accept that everything in my life is my fault and make it a way of life to take control of my own life (Mental self-disciplines & Habits) to become better?

The point is this: craving sympathy earns contempt, self-development earns R.E.S.P.E.C.T with self and with others. Self-esteem is EARNED and so is respect. How am I contributing to the well-being of others?

Of course, all people will face difficulties it’s a natural part of life and they’re important ‘LIFE PROBLEMS’ to solve and deal with. Nor does it mean any individual is more important than another…But what it clearly demonstrates is more; wisdom, greater skill and EFFORT.

If you feel out of control⬇️

STEP. 1 – Work on building MOMENTUM and ‘Radical-Humility’ to live in harmony with our environments.

Or STEP. 2– If we’re really being honest very few individuals need total psychiatric intervention.

For honest self-reflection⬇️

1. Do I quit a lot?
2. If I can’t do it? Do I try…again, again and again?
3. And If I still can’t do it? Do I put up my hand and ask the teacher?

To your breakthroughs,

Dave

The root of human chaos: EMOTIONS or Emotional Responsibility?

For example; imagine that we’re the producer of our own home movie with our mental thoughts “Imagination” as we choose to act and direct our film. In truth…we’re the main actor or actress? Now, what could be a problem? Most people don’t control their focus. Because what we choose to focus on shapes our life.

Self- Responsibility and Mental: Emotional health go hand in hand. They’re always in balance. The level of responsibility we accept in our lives for our (Health, Wealth, Love, Happiness) will be direct to the level of control we have in that particular area.

When we experience control in our lives = feelings of personal freedom and more positive emotions. And when we feel a lack of control = we can experience negative emotions, overwhelm or LEARNED helplessness.

All negative emotional patterns are learned throughout our lives. Can we unlearn these unresourceful emotional tendencies, limiting beliefs, habitual thinking patterns and emotional responses that cause under-achievement and unhappiness……Of Course?

Negative emotions used unwisely, serve no purpose. WE must shift as a society towards “emotional self-resilience” to gain confidence, self-control and enable clarity with our thought processes. Albert Einstein said, “The most important decision we make is whether we believe we live in a friendly or hostile universe?”

Do I focus on the positive or the negative? Constructive or destructive thoughts? Do I move towards pain or pleasure?

For a higher level of consciousness we as individuals must seek elimination and CONSTANT removal of all un-resourceful emotional tendencies, limiting beliefs, habitual ways of thinking, and emotional responses that are not helpful. It’s absolutely necessary for a higher level of consciousness and achievement.

For example; The most destructive emotion is Anger = resentment, jealousy, envy, impatient, self-abuse, denial, repression, pessimism and depression.

Guilt = feelings of worthlessness and destructive criticism. And it forms from justification, identification, lack of consideration, blaming, rationalisation. Accepting responsibility gains momentum, and blaming is backwards looking and un-productive.

We’re free to choose our response for any life situation. It’s our interpretation rather than the objective events themselves that give rise to our feelings and behaviours. And because human beings are literally the ultimate adaptation machines we can learn to modify our self-talk and adapt our behaviour to respond just like an optimistic person would. Adopting a growth-mindset means optimistic ways of explaining adversity, persevering and seeking out new challenges to achieve an even higher level of mastery. We can absolutely experience mastery at the same time as adversity.”

Therefore, our emotional response determines how we feel and we’re responsible for our thoughts, feelings and behaviours that flow. In all of life’s situations we’re free to choose, we always have been.

For Application;

1. Can I improve my Mental: Emotional responsibility?
2. What Beliefs & Habits do I have that are holding me back? For Achievement or Aggression, Addiction, Depression, Suicidal.
3. What do I now have to do?

In service,

Dave Barrie

Am I a victim of the world or an adventurer? Do I know who I am? Than what’s YOUR reason for being? It doesn’t matter if nobody believes in you or you have been abused, broke, divorced or didn’t have the parents you wanted. What’s more important is being the person you always wanted to be?

If I feel any form of stress that I know is not going to serve me I will give myself 1 minute to change my mental: emotional state. Anything more than one minute I consider dwelling and DOING depression. Unfortunately, most people approach life looking for what can go wrong? Does this mean I have the habit of spending more time looking for what is wrong? Could I ask myself? How can I turn this situation around? Because where focus goes, energy flows.

How Dave Barrie deals with depression?

Most people don’t like change that’s a fact. But change is one of life’s constants and making changes can be hard but also fun. Will you learn to fall in love with the process of change? because as Leonardo DaVinci said’ there’s no greater control than self-control over oneself.

I am perfect as I am ‘right’ now. But the current version of myself will be inferior in 1 years time. Is your past always going to be bigger than your future? What information do I need? Do I need to work on my personality? Do I need to change my environments?

There’s power in depression. If you’re not happy with where you are is change needed? A lot of human beings like to play games with their social behaviour (commonly referred as mental illnesses) in fear of making a change. If you’re about to make a change in your life and you feel extremely uncomfortable that’s the best indication you’re going to be challenged and grow as a human being. I love it because I have the opportunity to reinvent myself. What does the process of reinvention to you look like? What adjustments do you need to make? For example to your; Health, Relationships, Career, Personal-development.

Am I someone who allows my feelings to slide out of control instead of taking productive action? Will I master my own transformations? Because your challenge is your own psychology and emotionality. Where’s your emotional home? Where do you go emotionally when things are not going well? Is our self-perception in direct correlation to our personal-leadership?

Below are 3 practical ways you could transform⬇⬇⬇

Empowering routines

Could you train your body physically and mentally?  Do people respond to energy? Be honest, what are you consistently doing with your body? Would stagnation occur from a lack of movement?

Preparation is the ultimate self-confidence builder and therefore I have exercise, nutritional and educational routines that I engage in every day. If you want to be a person who sees things through, do you have to become the person who sees things through? Because I’m very clear on who I am I chase discomfort and counter-punch any unhelpful depressed emotional states with determination.

Self-Esteem

Unfortunately, our brain isn’t designed to make us feel good. Its built for survival. Which means making yourself feel good is an inside job and that’s your role. Harvard university studies reveal that happiness is a skill to be cultivated. Do you have meaningful relationships? And what attitude and activities do your friends and family have? Are they seriously positive people because it will affect your social: emotional states? Would it be wise to find the most optimistic person who overcomes any obstacle in their path and figure out what they know and how they approach life?

Do you have meaningful work? What activities do you enjoy? Are you the same person in private as you’re in public and on social media?

Self-esteem develops when you feel you’re “doing well in the world”. What are you contributing?

Transformational Vocabulary

Your self-talk is critical because the words we use create feelings and experiences. And your consistent choice in words will shape what you believe and impact your actions. Therefore, if you change the words you use you will change the quality of your life. Will I make my emotions work for me and feel any way I want at any time? Can I consciously shape my destiny?

The habitual thoughts and words you use can create illness, unfortunately most people are completely oblivious. For example, if you’re consistently labeling yourself as a failure and I’m feeling “depressed” you would feel the corresponding emotion and it will become your experience. The law of substitution is about swapping any negative thought for a positive thought. Could you replace the word “Depressed” to I’m feeling “curious” or “Challenged” and this would result in you taking control of your habitual vocabulary which will change your emotional state, your perception and overall experience. As a man thinks, so he is; as he continues to think, so he remains. Please consciously select vocabulary that will empower you.

A strong final thought: I would like to say that you’re valuable even if you don’t know why that is yet. All people have something to offer, because nobody does everything well. We’re connected and all need each other for something? We’re the same but different. Are we not all made from the one hand? To fulfill many of the missions I have in my life I now need to be supported by other people, perhaps you and I may even work together one day. How will you cultivate the truest version of yourself?

For your self-discovery;

1. Identify my emotional habits?
2. What are the daily habits I need to learn and have?
3. How can I elevate myself?

To your unique destiny,

Dave

What is anxiety?

Anxiety is simply the habit of worrying spiraling out of control. But it can be helpful to avoid danger with our ‘flight or fight’ responses.

However, your models of the world will affect how you feel and if you become overly worried about perceived threats that may not even occur or have a strong emotional need for certainty in multiple areas of your life you’re going to have a very stressful time dealing with day to day life. How will you feel if your worries are persistent? Could you learn to become more flexible?

Anxiety is the most common mental health condition in Australia and a third of women and a fifth of men will experience an anxiety disorder in their lives.

Remember, everyone has anxiety, problems and fears in their life. The difference is how we mentally and emotionally condition ourselves. What training do I need to do?

What’s the cause of anxiety?

When we are consistently feeling the emotions of worry, fear and overwhelm in non-life threatening situations. It’s a habit from repeated cognitive thinking, behavioural tendencies and emotional reactions that a person does without even realizing it. For example; how many people are afraid of public speaking? Do I know anybody who has died from public speaking?

In most anxiety cases people are afraid of losing their life, relationship, possessions and the inability to achieve their dream. If you know how to achieve what you need and want, we don’t fear the unknown as much. Life will test all people for their personal courage and persistence.

Traumatic events will trigger anxiety but it’s not the reason people live there emotionally. People stay there because they have unconsciously trained themselves to feel the way they do. For example; where do you live emotionally? Could I train myself to be strong, passionate and joyful? But it isn’t what you do occasionally it’s what we’re doing consistently.

Learn to use fear or it will use you

Its not that high performers are not afraid, its that they want to live up to their own potential and definition of success. One of the best ways to treat anxiety is learning how to leverage fear rather than being immobilized by fear and anxiety. There is only one way to learn and that is by action. Anxiety, worry, fear and having poor self-esteem is cured by action. When you stretch yourself and not waver with your dreams, goals and vision especially when it’s not going well by giving myself no way to go back I must worry about how I’m going to move forward. And that’s the hallmark of a growth-mindset.

Below are 4 practical ways to treat anxiety⬇

1. The number one regret of the dying

Imagine yourself in the nursing home reflecting on how you chose to live.

How would I feel knowing I had done all the things I wanted to do? Health, relationships, career, lifestyle. How does that make me feel knowing I will soon die? Will I be able to look back and say I lived my life with great purpose and joy?

What about from the perspective of not for filling my dream, goals and vision. Could I have done the things that made me feel anxious? uncomfortable or afraid? Do I have regrets or feel sadness? What did I miss out on? Who did I let down?

How will you feel when you know it’s too late to do the things you always wanted to do? And realize it’s because of how you approached your life. Remember, the choices we make shape our destiny.

2. Mind bank

Because I’m a person who has always had anxiety and had multiple incidents of extreme trauma. I still have panic attacks and sometimes for no reason at all, but I will recall previous experiences of panic attacks and how I resolve quickly. Your self-talk is critical. I recommend using empowering vocabulary and reminding yourself that it will pass as it’s a situation you can handle. This will shift your focus from anxious to excited. Become a curious person and write down approaches for next time.

If you see the world as a threatening place are you going to see and feel the world is a threatening place? Do I need to change my models of the world?

3. Decisive action

We don’t have to wait until we feel good. A lot of the time you won’t be motivated to do the things you know you need to do. For example; exercise, eat well, develop skills or regulate your emotions. But that’s a major difference between those who move past any obstacle they encounter in life and those who don’t. I do it regardless of how I feel, and it develops into the habit of not giving up and adjusting my approach when I do fail. How bad do you want your dream? Am I seeking a dream without wanting to live it out? Why do so many people not achieve their ultimate dream? They’re afraid it might not happen, and their fear of failure prevents them from starting in the first place or we start to experience a few obstacles along the way and that’s when most people give up. I will use my emotions, anxiety and energy to propel myself forward towards my worthy goals and dreams. Because mastering the lessons and healing from pain is a conscious choice.

4. Move your physiology

When our mental: emotional patterns are left unchecked our anxiety can spiral out of control and manifest into emotional or physical symptoms or both. For example; anxious, fearful, sweating and struggling to breathe. But when you change your physiology, it will change your state of mind. You can alter your alertness  by changing body positions to sit upright in the chair, standing powerfully with hands on hips, drinking a cup of water, dancing, gratitude practice and deliberate breath-work. Being intentional with your actions will change your focus. How will you change your focus?

If I feel any form of anxiety or stress that I know is not going to serve me I will give myself one minute to change my mental: emotional state. Anything more than one minute I consider dwelling. Unfortunately, most people approach life looking for what can go wrong? Does this mean I have the habit of spending more time looking for what is wrong? Could I ask myself? How can I turn this situation around? Because where focus goes, energy flows.

Anytime I realize my focus is off and there are unhelpful negative emotions, I know I must realign my mind and my heart. When your mind and heart are aligned you will feel calm and find the solutions you need. My attention then goes to my mission which makes me feel like I have immunity against any obstacle or personal challenge. If you’re stuck in your head you’re dead. Why do we need to listen to our hearts?

For self-discovery;

1. Identify why I have anxiety?
2. What are my triggers?
3. Will I do the training and self-discovery work?

To your health,

Dave

Fear of Failure is charactererized by our self-talk using the words; I can’t, I won’t, if only, I wish. I could, I should.

Fear of Rejection is characterized by the feelings I’m not enough. People might not accept me and my values, beliefs, behaviours.

To clear the mental decks for a more positive “Mental Attitude” and relationships you must IDENTIFY and DEAL with the fears that are holding you back…. Write them down!! and list HOW to go about it?

• The Fear of DEATH
• The Fear of CRITISCISM
• The Fear of ILL HEALTH
• The Fear of LOSS OF LOVE
• The Fear of OLD AGE
• The Fear of POVERTY

Once you recognize a fear it would be wise to act on it immediately to free your mind, because our destiny is a matter of making consistent choices. Success isn’t overnight and nor is failure. For things to get better you must become better. What action do you need to take?

When the opinions of others are involved I view ALL criticism as constructive, and I respect legitimate authority. But it’s wise to consider who you take advice from?

From being true to yourself you can lead with honour and eventually you’ll reach the point to where you understand how you want to die. The reality is it’s coming to us all.

Ask yourself?

1. What do I really want to do?
2. Are my obstacles real or imagined?
3. What would make me the happiest?

To your personal-growth,

Dave

Will you press on people’s sensitivities from time to time Dave? Yes, because it’s important for peoples growth and development.

#Aggression #Addiction #Anxiety #Depression #PTSD #loneliness #Suicide.  Are some of the deepest of human problems.

Do you give people labels Dave? No, we have to do that to ourselves.

Is there a cure? YES there are formulas to all the emotional states. And all emotions are valuable, But it also  requires the individual to acknowledge when problems occur and deal with them.

1. I’m responsible for all my thoughts and emotions at any time!
2. I have to be the source of my own transformation
3. I can change at any time the emotions I feel ? 

Can we shift our mental and emotional state? Yes

What about altering your biochemical state? Absolutely and at any time. Am I someone who treats the symptoms of my problems whilst nurturing the cause?

How people deal with adversity and personal challenges will shape them more than anything else. Then what would an evolved man or women look like? we need to first understand our transformative experiences of how we became the way we’re, the beliefs about our life that makes us think the way we do and act the way we do. Do I need to change the way I perceive things? And what actions do I need to change?

A pioneer who changed the game for biological stress was hungarian Hans Selye; he defined stress as any non-specific response to internal or external stimuli. Therefore the key terminology we need to grasp is “response” because it isn’t the events of our life that cause stress it’s our own chosen response. Therefore we don’t have stressful situations in life but stressful responses, and we can chose how we respond. In fact mans greatest personal power is his attitude to choose his own response for ANY life situation and your response will determine how you feel. And essentially what your willing to do or not do.

To be performing at my best I know I must present a calm mind, because if I allow my emotions to run wild there will be no clarity or objectivity about my thoughts, emotions and the ability to double check my work. Reactive people allow their emotions to dictate from personal bias and pre-conceived notions without realising they will be a product of their decisions. The inability to operate in open-minded ways will severely effect peoples mental: emotional health.

What can we do?

Learning how to think clearly and logically is a deliberate practise because we are not naturally endowed to think clearly and logically. From controlling my thinking processes I drastically minimize the stress in my life and achieve lifelong inner harmony with self and others, personal-growth, happiness and success.

As noted in my personal story I started curiously observing human behaviour at age 14 and it’s been a continuous effort of mine. There are telltale signs to human behaviour. Will I accept complete responsibility for my inner and outer life and how I feel about myself? At any time!

Do I consider myself to be a honest person? Are people born a victim? Are people born with negative emotions?

Will I improve my conscientiousness? ⬇

Organisation = Am I an organised person? How can I be better?

Perfectionism = Do I learn from my mistakes? Personally I love doing the hard things and when people say I’m unrealistic I just continue to surpass all expectations with awe. How will I improve?

Diligence = Do I really work hard when nobody is watching me? How would I rate my persistence on a scale of 1-10? Now compare my effort against the most persistent person I know?

Prudence = Do I make the ‘Right’ decision consistently? Have I learned to make the right decision consistently? The reason I have superior mental: emotional health is because I make superior evaluations, and that means positive brain chemistry. I will feel good no matter what happens in my life, just because I can. POWERFUL is an understatement. Interesting isn’t it?

Remember the emotional states that you’re feeling are because of HOW you evaluate? Are you being responsible for the reality you create?

It’s not the circumstances that happen to you, but HOW you think about what happens to you. Once again your response not your situation causes your stress. The choice is yours, it always has been.

For honest self-assessment;

1. Am I really an open-minded person? What would I have to believe to feel the way I do?
2. What would I have to change about my attitude? Could my personal philosophy be wrong? Do I need to change how I perceive things?
3. Does transformation require doing the work? Am I doing it? If I’ve tried everything do my results show it?

To our never-ending improvements,

Dave

To have what others want you have to do what others wont. Blaming something or someone else is weakness. Humility is a virtue to be actualized. Is Dave wrong?

How do you want to grow? Have you scheduled your growth? What’s your plan?

#Aggression #Addiction #Anxiety #Depression #PTSD #Suicide

Stress is a choice, and so is not achieving your goals and childhood dreams. What kind of person do you want to become?

1. The FIRST thing you need to understand is? people rarely make intellectual decisions. Peoples lives are linked and driven by our emotional patterns. What behaviours/emotions am I addicted to? Why do people act the way they do? And why do people develop “Learned helplessness”? Am I a victim of the world?

Aristotle said “We are what we repeatedly do”

And research suggests’ that virtually everything that we ALL do everyday is the result of habits. Am I choosing to react in a habitual way?

For things to change WE have to change. How will I resolve? Who do I have to give total love and total acceptance? Will my life grow by saying NO to the work that I need to do and learn?

2. The SECOND point I want people to grasp is? All emotions are valuable!! That’s if you know and understand HOW to utilize them in a productive manner.

For those who want to be the exception and play full out with Dave.

The Master skill is CONDITIONING⬇

HOW to condition your nervous system?

As outlined in my 14-17yr old experiences in my personal story. I had begun anticipating patterns in society. I also became obsessed with; Nelson Mandela, Mahatma Ghandi, Bruce Lee, Rocky Balboa and James Bond. There wisdom and skills fascinated me.

I thought how will Dave continue to condition himself and have their Mental: Emotional foundation? To have an unconquerable Soul

➡ Where no external experience will stop me

➡ Where my self-worth and belonging isn’t invested in material possessions nor other individuals

➡ Where I don’t fear ‘Lack of Love’ because I have so much of it and I have to GIVE it away

For Self-Examination;

1. What kind of emotions would I feel if I’m living and dwelling on the past? Who’s in charge of my mind?

2. Why does Dave have ‘EXTRAORDINARY’ mental, emotional and spiritual health? Have I really tried everything?

3. Who has impressed me with his/her growth-mindset? And why?

To our never-ending improvements,

Dave

#GROWTH-MINDSET